Statistics vs Relationship: WTF?! (Wheres The Faith)

Last week in the kitchen my friend and I have a small chit chat...went like this
Her: I wanna have a kid...is that selfish?
Me: Maybe...if you weren't Single. Maybe if you were doing it with someone else it would sound that way.
Her: I know but I dont want to get married and I've given up on relationships.
Me: I want a kid too, feel the same about relationships but why give up, right?
Her: true but the statistics of successful relations are dropping and divorce is going up....
Me: But statistically speaking... you smoke and drink...alot....so um

And thats where the convo kind of ended on a obvious odd note... simply... Health ramifications are more guaranteed before a statistic that your relationship wont last. If a Relationships fails... thats really on you.  

So this is chances.... just by Age... Not including, income, health, social status and Looks ( yes a lot of folks stay in relationships simply because they cant downgrade in the looks, sex, or money department)

Its just sad how people can use statistics to prove one part of their life may fail... and not to disprove it. But whats wrong with me, statistically speaking, I wasnt suppose to live on my own, in NYC, no kids, good, health, and be a college grad with fair credit...or even attend a college at all... or wait how old am I, arent I suppose to be Dead? But hey, thats just me. I dont have to show you the statistics for smokers and failed immune systems, just look up a truth ad campaign.


I know my friend isnt speaking for everyone but she isnt the only person I heard say that. WTF?! People where is your faith in Success. Nothing is easy but dont forget how to apply the knowledge you acquire

So, I would never bring up a problem without providing some solutions. I found 10 tips on avoiding divorce by Relationship Expert, Wife and Mother Michele Weiner-Davis. Simple tips, that applied with self honesty, will work (and if you wouldnt try this with ya spouse then you need to cut that long "fling" short)

1. Spend time together. Weiner-Davis warns that if you stop getting that quality time you run the risk of losing your friendship with your spouse.

2. Have sex. Pretty self-explanatory. Weiner-Davis says you better get it on!

3. Touch. Now, this one is different than #2. You gotta make sure you hug and kiss and cuddle and all that good stuff.

4. Flirt.  <---- C'mon Son, If you dunno how to flirt in your relationship

5. Talk frequently.  Like Really talk... quality conversation (note: quality) is important to me.

6. Give compliments.

Shoot, man. I do try. I just…fall short. *adding this one to my to-do list as well, plan to shoot hubby a “Damn, you look hot!” comment tomorrow*

7. Take a marriage class.... or Relationship Counseling   

NOT YOUR FRIEND... but I know there’s something you can learn in terms of your communication, and understanding of each other.

8. Handle conflict constructively.   (for Me this Means DOing whatever it take not to got to bed Mad)

9. Focus on the positives.

REAL Positives...not some "but it feel good tho" excuse or some shallow minded thing

10. Do “real” giving.

This one is pretty much following along the lines of the 5 love languages. It requires giving your spouse what he or she needs, regardless of whether you feel it’s important. Plus be Happy bout it...In my next relationship Im going to practice this a lot more.

How many did you mark off this check list and what are other ways you look out for your love and health?